I've been fighting with baby blues for a couple of months now, and I will have times feeling no desire to get out of bed in the morning. I mean, I can feed Nate without getting out of bed, I can change his diaper without leaving bed, so why get up? The girls will get into things and make messes with or without me around, so what's the point?
I started feeling like just going back to bed a couple of hours ago, and I did. I didn't feel like my family would even notice. As I watched Nate playing on the bed in front of me I thought "come on, put on your big girl panties, get up, go make dinner, and pretend to be happy!" I then realized that I didn't want to! I wanted to take my big girl panties, burn them, and throw a pity party! A big pity party, with loads of chocolate and coffee! Then I heard the Holy Spirit's little voice reminding me that when I am weak Jesus is better able to show me His strength.
2 Corinthians 12:9 "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."
So although throwing a pity party is wrong and hiding in my room for the sake of essentially pouting is wrong, feeling exhausted isn't wrong, feeling weak isn't wrong, and wanting chocolate isn't wrong! As long as I look to God above all else and I remember his promises, at the end of the day I think I'm doing pretty good!
~L
